The Story of Bug
I was lying in bed last night thinking about my little man and decided that I wanted to share the story of how he came to be. It's a pretty amazing story in my opinion, one that I can't wait to recount and share with him when he's old enough.
His story requires a bit of background. As long as I can remember, I've always had "female problems". My mom, bless her clueless heart, always dismissed them as normal and reminded me that I had plenty of years to get "used to it". Well when I got into my early 20s I decided that I needed to consult a doctor because this just wasn't normal to me. Being unable to function for a portion of the month due to cramping, etc just didn't make sense. So I made an appointment to see a specialist. Long story short, we found out that I had endometriosis and it was pretty severe. This was back in the 80s and laproscopic surgery was virtually unheard of. I ended up having much of my reproductive organs removed due to large endometrial cysts and damage. I was informed at the age of 23 that I'd never be able to conceive on my own, and only had a 4% chance of conceiving with assistance. I was devastated. All my life, growing up, the only thing I aspired to be was a MOM. I wanted 5 kids...well realistically I'd have been happy with 2 or 3 but I was in MOM MODE. I resigned myself to the fact that I'd never have "my own" kids and moved on with life. A few years later I became a licensed foster parent with the intent of fostering to adopt. A couple years later, my life changed, my relationship at the time ended and the children I was fostering were returned to their parents.
Fast forward to the year 2000. I'm having more "female problems". I find out that my gynecologist has retired...and I've moved over an hour away so I need to find another doc. A friend recommends this doctor near me. I go in for a consultation/exam. She's AMAZING. She's brilliant, caring, compassionate, just an incredible doc. She does some tests and calls me to tell me that I have to have surgery again. In the midst of all this I find out that she's not only an ob/gyn but also a fertility specialist. She does the surgery, this time a laporoscope, and afterwards she has me schedule a consultation with her. She tells me that I'm a perfect candidate for IVF and if I decide to try it, to just let her know. JD and I had already agreed/resigned ourselves to the fact that we'd never be parents...however, her words rang in my head for days. "Perfect candidate"..."very good chance of success". JD and I talked about it but he was less convinced than I that it was a good move. So we tabled the discussion. A year later he brings it up..."Let's try".
I call the specialist and we start the process for IVF. JDs insurance covered the procedure (only one time) but not the injectables. Around this time I joined an IVF support group online - made up of all women that were going through IVF or had gone through it previously. I started to make friends with some of these women, we never met in person but we chatted online and via instant message. My doctor tells me that she's able to get some of the meds donated from the drug companies so we'll be able to get through the cycle without putting out thousands of dollars. I'm relieved. We begin attempt #1.
JD and I go through the training to learn how to do the injections, how to handle all the meds, etc. It was like going to school, taking notes, making lists, etc. We were knee deep in baby making. After 12 days of injections and a multitude of ultrasounds and blood draws (daily), they deem me a non-responder. I'm not making follicles, much less eggs. They won't even allow me to make it to retrieval. JD and I are crushed. We had decided that we'd try one time and if it didn't work, we'd move on...after all his insurance only covers the one cycle. When this happened we decided it was the Lord's way of telling us it wasn't meant to be.
Right about this time I met with our pastor and accepted Jesus Christ into my life as my Savior. I talked to my pastor about the IVF cycle and that it hadn't worked. We prayed about it and talked about it. We started to move on trying to accept what had happened. Less than a week later, my doctor called to tell me that JD's insurance had notified them that they would cover one more cycle since we canceled before retrieval. I explained to them that we had decided not to try again. She said she understood but if I did change my mind, to call her. She had a new protocol that she was positive would be the key for us.
The next week I'm at work and the UPS man arrives with a package for me. It's from an address in New Jersey. I don't know anyone in NJ. I open it to find sealed packages of fertility medication. There is a note inside, it's from one of the women on the IVF Support Group. She's now pregnant with twins, had additional medication leftover from her last cycle (it's sealed and completely safe) and wanted to share it with someone who could use it. She asked for no money in return, just a photo of the baby once I gave birth (!!!). I was floored to say the least. Two days later another package arrives. This one from Texas. Another woman in the group was pregnant and had leftover medication. She hoped the "lucky meds" would be the trick for me.
That night I came home from work and took all the donated medication and set it out on the kitchen table. We had enough medication to cover my cycle AND redonate some to someone else!! JD and I talked and prayed about it and decided that we couldn't NOT try one more time. There were far too many signs pointing to this cycle being viable.
I called my doc and we set up the schedule to start. This cycle was picture perfect considering the fact that I only have half of my reproductive organs! Follicles were growing...we were well on our way. My doctor had talked to us about the possibility of having more eggs/embryos than we are prepared to transfer. I told her that I was perfectly comfortable transferring up to 3 embies. She tried to discourage me but I was insistent...3 would be my limit. Throughout the cycle I kept praying, if we would get 6 viable eggs....that would be perfect. If out of those 6, we could fertilize 3 to good quality embryos, I was prepared to transfer all 3. I gave it all into God's hands.
The day of retrieval, my doctor was out of the office and her partner did the retrieval. Afterwards she came in to talk to me and looked a bit disappointed when she told me that she got "only 6" eggs but they were all good quality. I was ECSTATIC! This is exactly what I had hoped for, this was exactly what I knew I could handle and the Lord had heard my prayers.
Two days later my doctor called to tell me that unfortunately 3 of the eggs had not fertilized but that I had 3 solid, good quality embryos growing. She again tried to discourage me from transferring all 3, trying to encourage me to transfer 2 and freeze one. I wasn't going to be dissuaded. The Lord knew what He was doing and I knew He wouldn't give me more than I could handle. I was confident of that. If I was meant to have 3 babies, then that's what I'd have. My future was totally and completely in God's hands.
When transfer day came, again she tried to dissuade me. I insisted that we were transferring all 3 embryos. I wasn't leaving one of them behind...if they were meant to thrive, I was going to give them every chance possible. So on that warm July day we transferred 3 quality embryos into my uterus.
Then came the waiting...the wondering. I knew that with the meds in my system, if I took a pregnancy test too soon I'd get a false positive. I was having all kinds of strange symptoms and changes to my body. I didn't know if I was truly pregnant or if my body/mind was playing tricks on me. So I waited...and the day that I KNEW would be a true positive if I was pregnant, I went out and bought not one, not two, but three pregnancy tests. I woke up first thing in the morning and took one of them into the bathroom. JD was in the kitchen getting ready for work. I peed on the stick and waited. Within SECONDS the line showed up...PREGNANT!!! I immediately ran out to the kitchen to show him, thrusting the test in his face. His first response of course was, "I thought you had to wait for your blood test?" Hehe That day I took the other two tests, just to make sure and also because I couldn't believe it.
We held off until the blood test on Wednesday before we announced it to our parents and family. It was nervewracking not being able to tell anyone our little secret. My blood test numbers were pretty high, high enough that my doctor wondered if I might be carrying two. As the weeks wore on and we finally got to see our little Bug on ultrasound and hear his heartbeat we confirmed that it was indeed one little one. A very STRONG willed one at that.
I had an awesome pregnancy, no complications, no problems. The only problem was the fact that at about 32 weeks I was measuring 8 weeks ahead. I'm fairly petite and by doing some tests we were able to confirm that Bug was going to be a pretty big kiddo. They were sure he'd be over 9 lbs. at birth. So the last 9 weeks of my pregnancy I was tremendous...he wasn't moving around very much simply because he had nowhere to go. 8 days after his due date, via c-section (only because he wasn't moving down and I wasn't progressing) our "little" Bug was born. He was over 10 lbs. at birth. They had to go to the children's hospital wing to get him pajamas and diapers...he had already outgrown the newborn size!
He's been my biggest treasure and my greatest gift. He's happy, healthy, loving, thoughtful, considerate, funny, and all boy. Every day I thank the Lord for this incredible gift he's entrusted to me. I know for sure that if it wasn't for God, my son would not be here. He had a guiding and active hand in the creation of this little boy from DAY ONE. I am positive of that.
I did have a fair amount of meds leftover after my pregnancy, so I redonated it to another woman that was part of the group. She went on to have twins. =) That was definitely some lucky medication!!!
So there you have the story of Bug. Pretty cool if you ask me.
His story requires a bit of background. As long as I can remember, I've always had "female problems". My mom, bless her clueless heart, always dismissed them as normal and reminded me that I had plenty of years to get "used to it". Well when I got into my early 20s I decided that I needed to consult a doctor because this just wasn't normal to me. Being unable to function for a portion of the month due to cramping, etc just didn't make sense. So I made an appointment to see a specialist. Long story short, we found out that I had endometriosis and it was pretty severe. This was back in the 80s and laproscopic surgery was virtually unheard of. I ended up having much of my reproductive organs removed due to large endometrial cysts and damage. I was informed at the age of 23 that I'd never be able to conceive on my own, and only had a 4% chance of conceiving with assistance. I was devastated. All my life, growing up, the only thing I aspired to be was a MOM. I wanted 5 kids...well realistically I'd have been happy with 2 or 3 but I was in MOM MODE. I resigned myself to the fact that I'd never have "my own" kids and moved on with life. A few years later I became a licensed foster parent with the intent of fostering to adopt. A couple years later, my life changed, my relationship at the time ended and the children I was fostering were returned to their parents.
Fast forward to the year 2000. I'm having more "female problems". I find out that my gynecologist has retired...and I've moved over an hour away so I need to find another doc. A friend recommends this doctor near me. I go in for a consultation/exam. She's AMAZING. She's brilliant, caring, compassionate, just an incredible doc. She does some tests and calls me to tell me that I have to have surgery again. In the midst of all this I find out that she's not only an ob/gyn but also a fertility specialist. She does the surgery, this time a laporoscope, and afterwards she has me schedule a consultation with her. She tells me that I'm a perfect candidate for IVF and if I decide to try it, to just let her know. JD and I had already agreed/resigned ourselves to the fact that we'd never be parents...however, her words rang in my head for days. "Perfect candidate"..."very good chance of success". JD and I talked about it but he was less convinced than I that it was a good move. So we tabled the discussion. A year later he brings it up..."Let's try".
I call the specialist and we start the process for IVF. JDs insurance covered the procedure (only one time) but not the injectables. Around this time I joined an IVF support group online - made up of all women that were going through IVF or had gone through it previously. I started to make friends with some of these women, we never met in person but we chatted online and via instant message. My doctor tells me that she's able to get some of the meds donated from the drug companies so we'll be able to get through the cycle without putting out thousands of dollars. I'm relieved. We begin attempt #1.
JD and I go through the training to learn how to do the injections, how to handle all the meds, etc. It was like going to school, taking notes, making lists, etc. We were knee deep in baby making. After 12 days of injections and a multitude of ultrasounds and blood draws (daily), they deem me a non-responder. I'm not making follicles, much less eggs. They won't even allow me to make it to retrieval. JD and I are crushed. We had decided that we'd try one time and if it didn't work, we'd move on...after all his insurance only covers the one cycle. When this happened we decided it was the Lord's way of telling us it wasn't meant to be.
Right about this time I met with our pastor and accepted Jesus Christ into my life as my Savior. I talked to my pastor about the IVF cycle and that it hadn't worked. We prayed about it and talked about it. We started to move on trying to accept what had happened. Less than a week later, my doctor called to tell me that JD's insurance had notified them that they would cover one more cycle since we canceled before retrieval. I explained to them that we had decided not to try again. She said she understood but if I did change my mind, to call her. She had a new protocol that she was positive would be the key for us.
The next week I'm at work and the UPS man arrives with a package for me. It's from an address in New Jersey. I don't know anyone in NJ. I open it to find sealed packages of fertility medication. There is a note inside, it's from one of the women on the IVF Support Group. She's now pregnant with twins, had additional medication leftover from her last cycle (it's sealed and completely safe) and wanted to share it with someone who could use it. She asked for no money in return, just a photo of the baby once I gave birth (!!!). I was floored to say the least. Two days later another package arrives. This one from Texas. Another woman in the group was pregnant and had leftover medication. She hoped the "lucky meds" would be the trick for me.
That night I came home from work and took all the donated medication and set it out on the kitchen table. We had enough medication to cover my cycle AND redonate some to someone else!! JD and I talked and prayed about it and decided that we couldn't NOT try one more time. There were far too many signs pointing to this cycle being viable.
I called my doc and we set up the schedule to start. This cycle was picture perfect considering the fact that I only have half of my reproductive organs! Follicles were growing...we were well on our way. My doctor had talked to us about the possibility of having more eggs/embryos than we are prepared to transfer. I told her that I was perfectly comfortable transferring up to 3 embies. She tried to discourage me but I was insistent...3 would be my limit. Throughout the cycle I kept praying, if we would get 6 viable eggs....that would be perfect. If out of those 6, we could fertilize 3 to good quality embryos, I was prepared to transfer all 3. I gave it all into God's hands.
The day of retrieval, my doctor was out of the office and her partner did the retrieval. Afterwards she came in to talk to me and looked a bit disappointed when she told me that she got "only 6" eggs but they were all good quality. I was ECSTATIC! This is exactly what I had hoped for, this was exactly what I knew I could handle and the Lord had heard my prayers.
Two days later my doctor called to tell me that unfortunately 3 of the eggs had not fertilized but that I had 3 solid, good quality embryos growing. She again tried to discourage me from transferring all 3, trying to encourage me to transfer 2 and freeze one. I wasn't going to be dissuaded. The Lord knew what He was doing and I knew He wouldn't give me more than I could handle. I was confident of that. If I was meant to have 3 babies, then that's what I'd have. My future was totally and completely in God's hands.
When transfer day came, again she tried to dissuade me. I insisted that we were transferring all 3 embryos. I wasn't leaving one of them behind...if they were meant to thrive, I was going to give them every chance possible. So on that warm July day we transferred 3 quality embryos into my uterus.
Then came the waiting...the wondering. I knew that with the meds in my system, if I took a pregnancy test too soon I'd get a false positive. I was having all kinds of strange symptoms and changes to my body. I didn't know if I was truly pregnant or if my body/mind was playing tricks on me. So I waited...and the day that I KNEW would be a true positive if I was pregnant, I went out and bought not one, not two, but three pregnancy tests. I woke up first thing in the morning and took one of them into the bathroom. JD was in the kitchen getting ready for work. I peed on the stick and waited. Within SECONDS the line showed up...PREGNANT!!! I immediately ran out to the kitchen to show him, thrusting the test in his face. His first response of course was, "I thought you had to wait for your blood test?" Hehe That day I took the other two tests, just to make sure and also because I couldn't believe it.
We held off until the blood test on Wednesday before we announced it to our parents and family. It was nervewracking not being able to tell anyone our little secret. My blood test numbers were pretty high, high enough that my doctor wondered if I might be carrying two. As the weeks wore on and we finally got to see our little Bug on ultrasound and hear his heartbeat we confirmed that it was indeed one little one. A very STRONG willed one at that.
I had an awesome pregnancy, no complications, no problems. The only problem was the fact that at about 32 weeks I was measuring 8 weeks ahead. I'm fairly petite and by doing some tests we were able to confirm that Bug was going to be a pretty big kiddo. They were sure he'd be over 9 lbs. at birth. So the last 9 weeks of my pregnancy I was tremendous...he wasn't moving around very much simply because he had nowhere to go. 8 days after his due date, via c-section (only because he wasn't moving down and I wasn't progressing) our "little" Bug was born. He was over 10 lbs. at birth. They had to go to the children's hospital wing to get him pajamas and diapers...he had already outgrown the newborn size!
He's been my biggest treasure and my greatest gift. He's happy, healthy, loving, thoughtful, considerate, funny, and all boy. Every day I thank the Lord for this incredible gift he's entrusted to me. I know for sure that if it wasn't for God, my son would not be here. He had a guiding and active hand in the creation of this little boy from DAY ONE. I am positive of that.
I did have a fair amount of meds leftover after my pregnancy, so I redonated it to another woman that was part of the group. She went on to have twins. =) That was definitely some lucky medication!!!
So there you have the story of Bug. Pretty cool if you ask me.
3 comments:
Very very cool hon :)
My best friend had one child then a set of twins through IVF. It is the most amazing gift.
Wow, 10 lbs!!! That was one BIG baby!!!
Hugs
Fi
xxxx
Very cool story Drama :)
I remember youtelling me Bug was a IFB, but never heard the whole story.
And when he's older he'll have quite the story to past on to his kids...
The wonders of medical technology ;-)!
My BFF also has severe endometriosis; went thru 3 laparoscopic surgeries & got PG w/her 1st via IUI... However she became spontaneously PG w/#2 when the baby was 10 mos old.
[you know I don't mean "spontaneous" in the sense of A Miraculous Virgin Birth; I was going to say "natural" but hell, ALL pregnancies are natural! Since I'm keeping it anonymous, I can tell the joke: her husband loves to brag: "We only did it once that month!"]
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